Archive of a Choose Your On Adventure Style Story
Based on The Company by Mat Ryer and Mark Watson I wrote a Spin-Off episode of their CYOA story. The proceedings of the plot are determined by the readers‘ votes in Twitter polls. It went as follows:
26th of June
Quote-Tweet MarkWatsonCo
Oooh, some unexpected time off from pending murder prevention duty! That leaves a bit of room some slow paste adventure-relaxing. What are we gonna do with our free time? (THREAD)
28th of June
Yeah, we‘ve got to stay focused on what lies ahead. We‘ve committed to our position @MarkWatsonCo and we‘re prepared to give it 110%. Job first, downtime second, helping out friends somewhere down on this list too.
29th of June
30th of June I
It was one of these days. The clouds were so thick, they seemed to want to suffocate the sun for good. Drowning the city in grey. And we are humming RATVBD songs on our way to the museum to prevent and or or solve a robbery with a spring in our step.
In front of the entrance an eccentrically dressed woman hands out flyers for the current exhibition. They read: “REGART – a reflection on random tat being decadently raised in value by being declared ‘art’. If one of these got stolen it would be a fiasco.”
“Weird thing to put on a flyer, isn’t it?”, the woman says. “But the things in there are worth between 14,442 and 995,400 a piece! By the way: I’ve been out here doing this all day. In case I need an alibi.”
She winks. We wink back, which feels awkward so we hurry into the museum. Time to smell out that crime! We can feel it in the air, the taste of wrongdoing hangs all over this place. We take a good look around and a good listen.
“Panic! Scandal! You! Crime!” – There we go. A guard is running towards us. Gasping for air with the facial expression of someone who‘s just noticed that an arts collection is missing an obscenely valuable exhibit. Perfect!
“This is exactly what I‘ve come here for. I should try to solve this asap.”, we think. Then we say it out loud. The guard seems ecstatic: “Fantastic. Will you please?” They point us to the next room where we glance around. Obviously something has been stolen from here.
Alt-Text: Photo of 6 frames on a white wall. In the first one is a sunflower, in the second a bicycle, in the third a bin bag, the fourth is empty, in the fifth a peacock feather and in the sixth a biscuit.
POLL
What object are we looking for?
A bandana – 7,1%
A toothbrush – 42,9%
Sunglasses – 28,6%
A can of baked beans -21,4%
14 votes
30th of June II
POLL
How do we search for another clue?
Using a magnifying glass – 15,4%
Do some research reading – 15,4%
Question witnesses – 53,8%
Appropriately dressed – 15,4%
13 votes
1st of July
Apart from us there are two people in the room at the moment. The guard and a guy intensely staring at the empty frame. We approach the latter: “Excuse me, I was wondering…”
“Do you know who I am?”, he asks emphatically. “Yes, of course.”, we reply without hesitation. Damn it. This place really messes with our coping strategies to cover up uncertainties and it isn’t helping the case.
“Someone has meddled with my piece. I don’t know if it has ruined it or made it better.” Ha! He’s the artist. So we haven’t lost our luck just yet.
“I’m a big fan of your work. The duality of the mundane. It’s deeply thought provoking. This was my favourite piece of yours so far.” – Oh, fuck. That won’t help finding out what’s missing from it, will it?
He turns to us and smiles: “Thank you. Here take this. I’ve doodled it earlier. Shall I sign it for you.” We feel proficiently dealt with, pocket the folded piece of paper he’s handed us and go back to the guard.
Alright, we mustn’t lose focus. It’s ok not to know everything. Art isn’t meant to be understood – especially not without having any context. We’ll just have to ask. “Sorry, I don’t really get what’s been stolen. Can you help me out?” They seem slightly surprised, but friendly.
There’s a pause. They’re glazing into the middle distance. Concentrated. We feel the skepticism in us about getting a clear answer increase. After a minute they say:
“What? Watch, the crucial agenda is that you’ll have got it. The other things express help: the overall goal, never the wrong area, remember it.” They look incredibly pleased with themselves.
We have the sneaking suspicion that there might have been less cryptic clues somewhere. What do we reckon though?
Alt-Text: Photo of 6 frames on a white wall. In the first one is a sunflower, in the second a bicycle, in the third a bin bag, the fourth is empty, in the fifth a peacock feather and in the sixth a biscuit.
POLL
What item is missing?
A bandana – 20%
Sunglasses – 26,7%
A can of baked beans – 13,3%
Let’s have a cry – 40%
14 votes
3rd of July
We sit down and start bawling our eyes out. Why can’t anything in our lives be easy to understand? Most of the insults from Camilla’s honey friends, which keep popping up on the socials and in our letterbox, are written in Vigenère cipher for fuck’s sake!
What if @MarkWatsonCo finds out about this disaster here? What if they don’t find out about it and the responsibility to prevent this murder stays in our incompetent hands? What if we have to fear not being able to read all their messages during our next mission all of a sudden?
Wait a second. That’s exactly why we decided to look for a case like this. Lower stakes, but still a real crime in the real world. We need to pull through this. We’ve got to be prepared. We can do it!
The guard, who’s respectfully stepped away a bit and led people around us as if we were part of an installation, looks at us reassuringly. We get up. Let’s take one more glance at those frames.
Alt-Text: Photo of 6 frames on a white wall. In the first one is a sunfloweR, in the second a bicyclE, in the third a bin baG, the fourth is empty, in the fifth a peacock featheR and in the sixth a biscuiT.
The title of the current exhibition is REGART.
In the tweets leading up to the first poll about the missing items the last letters of the guard’s words spellesd ‚clue‘. The last letters of the 7 tweets spelled ‚pointer‘.
The last letters in the guard’s next clue also spelled something.
POLL
What item is missing?
A bandana – 82%
Sunglasses – 19%
A can of baked beans – 0%
I don’t read ALT texts – 0%
11 votes
4th of July
Eureka! It has to be a bandana missing from the frame! The guard appears to be pleased with us. “Well done! I knew you’re the right person to solve this. Sorry, for being that cryptic.
“Everyone who’s been on the crime scene has gathered here and next door. I’ll fetch you some personnel files from the office. They’ll probably be useful. That leaves you enough time for about three interrogations or comparable stuff once I’m gone.”
“And I’ll have to close up the museum right after I’m back. I know this isn’t ideal. Sort of putting a countdown on the investigations. But you come across as someone who’s got to practise being under that kind of pressure. Ok, I’m off.”
POLL
We reply:
“That’s decent of you!” – 14,3%
“Off, off Tigress!” – 38,8%
“Bring that stuff, yo!” – 14,3%
“Great! Hellish climax!” – 33,3%
7th of July
The guard stares at us with the confused expression of someone desperately trying to pigeonhole a statement. They turn around and walk away absorbed in thought. We assume that could have gone worse. But it probably also could have gone better.
Also we’re smashing reading this guard’s facial expressions, aren’t we? However, we’ve got to focus on the task ahead. There is no one left in this room, so we head over to the next one the guard has pointed us to some time – which weirdly feels like days – ago.
There are quite a lot of people in there. And some more art. Looks like painting of circles mainly, obviously developed in free association with Venn – No, we’ve got to stop the bullshitting for a sec.
Everyone fortunately wears a badge with their name and their role on it.
Linda, the director of the museum, is nervously pacing up and down. Flavia, a curator, sits on the floor in a corner, leaning on the wall, smoking. And a journalist called Felix is furiously scribbling in a notebook.
Apart from those 3 there is a group of 3 not further defined visitors. Yet. Talking to the group might take up more time than talking to a single person. It could be worth it though.
POLL
Who are we going to talk to first?
Visitors – 21,1%
Linda (director) – 21,1%
Flavia (curator) – 15,8%
Felix (journalist) – 42%
19 votes
8th of July
Yes! We should talk to the journalist. The guy’s called Felix, we’ve just thought the word ‘fortunately’, we don’t believe in coincidences that could result from our thought processes sometimes resembling wordings put together at 1am.
As we approach him he looks up and narrows his eyes suspiciously.
“Wait”, he says, “who are you all of a sudden?” He starts flipping through his notes. We’re meant to ask the questions, aren’t we? Before we’re able to answer he continues:
“I’m Felix. My employer gave me a short noticed extension on my deadline for a crucial and complex potential murder case report I’ve been working on. I wanted to use the extra time to keep my crime reporting in top shape and came to the museum to find a case to practise on.”
“Minutes after I arrived a theft happened! Exciting!”
We feel our world leaning into a tumble as a never-felt dread crawls up our spine. The realisation that this world is not built around us.
“But I’m more or less stuck.” – Phew, good!
“Excuse me?” Have we said this out loud?
“Sorry, journalist, nevermind that. Maybe I can help? Have you come to any conclusions at all?” – Are we envious that the guy has a name?
“Well, I’ve considered dozens of possible progressions of events.”
Huh, useful.
“What?”
“Just go on, please.”
“And I’m sure of one thing:”
“The thief must already have been wearing a piece of headwear when they entered the museum.”
“What/y?”
“There’s absolutely no doubt about it.”
Several people in the room are wearing hats. There’s also a hat stand with a couple of hats on it. Felix is wearing a fedora of course.
Now, that’s been a conversation and we’ve definitely acquired one piece of information through it.
POLL
Since talking to the visitors will take up more time there are only three options left before the guard returns.
Who are we going to interrogate next?
Group of visitors – 5,3%
Director then curator – 36,8%
Curator then director – 57,9%
19 votes
9th of July
We walk up to Flavia. She lackadaisically stares at one of the paintings. We clear our throat. She turns to us, blinks once unusually slowly, and draws on her cigarette.
“Are you allowed to smoke in here?”, we choose as our conversation starter.
“Yes, I am.”
Probably wasn’t our best choice so far.
“So you, uhm, you’ve curated this exhibition, right?”
“I am credited for it. I also think it’s pretentious shit. Could you just be upfront please? I don’t care for smalltalk.”
This seems doable and like a good idea looking back at our two previous questions:
“I’m trying to solve this crime to keep my instincts top notch, because my job I’m very excited about and keen to keep depends on it. And a life maybe. What were you doing at the time of crime?”
“Hm. Decent motivation, I guess. I talked to someone for nearly the whole afternoon. About our MSLTs. I don’t often meet people who share my interest in that field. It was a great conversation, but also really exhausting.”
“The ultimate wavelength test is being silent together and see, if it doesn’t feel uncomfortable, don’t you think?”, she says, offering us a cigarette.
POLL
What do we do?
Sit and smoke with her – 38%
Pocket fag and go – 19%
Politely refuse – 19%
Check inventory – 24%
16 votes
10th of July I
…
…
…
…
…
POLL
…
Continue smoking – 53%
Back to crime solving – 47%
17 votes
10th of July II
…
…
…
…
…
POLL
…
Continue for a bit – 50%
Back to the case now – 50%
20 votes
10th of July III
…
…
“Thanks.”
“Cheers.”
We’ve noticed Linda, the director of the museum, repeatedly stopping in her pacing to shoot disapproving glances at us. It might be wiser not to fully get on her bad side before we’ve talked to her.
“Sorry, about the smoking. Is everything alright?”
“Everything is perfect.
“I love pieces worth 995,400 vanishing from my museum. It’s so relaxing. Talking to the insurance company about this is the best activity I could possibly imagine to end this day and fill the next couple of weeks and months with.
“Let’s all sit around and radiate some indifference to celebrate.”
“I see. Well… Wait a second.” – We’ve heard this number before, haven’t we? – “The bandana was the most valuable single thing on display?”
“YES, IT BLOODY WAS FOR FUCK’S SAKE! Oh God.” She puts her hands over her face and collapses into a squat.
Ah. Now, we know that state -physically and mentally- from the inside.
“This has been a lot for you obviously. It’s impressive how you’ve been coping. I’m doing my best to find this exhibit. I feel like I’m not too far from succeeding to do so actually. Do you think you could answer some questions maybe?”
She groans in what we take as an affirmative way. “The frames are supposed to be one piece of art, aren’t they? Are the specific values of the separate objects a well known fact?”
She shakes her head.
“Is there anyone on the staff you’d think capable of committing a theft?”
She looks up gobsmacked, maybe even insulted by our question.
“No, I don’t have the slightest doubt in my team. We’ve got a slightly unconventional but very reliable interview method in place to ensure only trustworthy people get employed. As long as it’s conducted properly it’s completely infallible.
“Everyone I’ve interviewed myself has my full unconditional trust. Now, excuse me, please. I’ve got things to organise.”
She exits the room. We can hear her starting to pace up and down next door.
POLL
The guard is about to return. We’ve got one moment to picture something that makes us feel confident/calm/inspired/… to clear our minds before we solve this case.
What do we imagine?
(Option 4: If the likes on a comment beat the most voted for option, we’ll go with that)
Ice cream – 8,3%
Gaffa tape – 8,3%
Turtle in a turtleneck – 75,1%
Other (comment/like) – 8,3%
11th of July
We picture a turtle wearing a turtleneck sweater and chuckle. Very good. We feel refreshed. We feel ready. And, as if they were waiting for it, the guard returns with a pile of papers.
“Here are the files. The photos are taken when people enter the building and updated every day. Sorry about the quality of the copies. Our printer is weird sometimes.
„If someone spends longer than an hour in a room, we’ve got to employ them for the day for insurance reasons. So there are files on every suspect here.”
They hand us the files, add: “Well, I think that’s all you need. I’ll leave it to you.”, and hurry to the other side of the room. We take a look at their file. Their phone number is written on the back of it. But let’s not lose focus again.
Here are the files:
POLL
Frédérique (guard) – 0 votes
Heather (visitor 1) – 3 votes
Flavia (curator) – 3 votes
Dirk (artist) – 5 votes
Jim (visitor 2) – 2 votes
Ekaterina (flyerer) – 4 votes
Linda (director) – 8 votes
Vaughn (visitor 3) – 1 vote
12th of July
Yes, Linda appears to have the strongest motive. The museum is having problemos and she obviously cares a lot about the place and the people working there. But are we really sure that she would pull this off as a promotion stunt/ insurance scam?
Bringing up false accusations is not what we should aim for on our downtime excursion probably. Not sure if it would go down well with @MarkWatsonCo . It might, but also – as so many things – it might not. And it presumably wouldn’t be great for Linda either.
We should be unshakeably confident about this. We’ve obtained pieces of information in our conversations. Felix has said something about hats, Flavia claimed to have talked to someone, Linda said something about an infallible indication, if someone’s trustworthy.
They could be lying of course, but we’re sure that only the thief would choose to lie and only in a way that would clearly divert suspicion from themself. It doesn’t mean someone who’s told us about their own alibi HAS to be lying though. Fuck, it’s fiddly, isn’t it?
POLL
Who has stolen the bandana?
(3 Polls to fit all suspects, the option with the most votes between all 9 will be the one we’re going with, suspects sorted from highest to lowest votes from former poll now)
Linda, we’re sure of it – 0 votes
Felix (journalist) – 2 votes
Dirk (artist) – 4 votes
Ekaterina (flyerer) – 4 votes
Flavia (curator) – 1 vote
Heather (visitor 1) – 1 vote
Jim (visitor 2) – 3 votes
Vaughn (visitor 3) – 2 votes
Frédérique (guard) – 0 votes
13th of July
We’re sure it couldn’t have been Linda now. Doesn’t feel right and also she couldn’t have done it according to Felix’s reasoning. Dirk seems to have suddenly vanished from the scene, he’s undoubtedly trustworthy according to Linda though.
Ekaterina acted extremely suspiciously, telling us her alibi without being asked for one. But conforming to the high codex of flyering to maintain all credibility humanly possible in this position:
When on duty your honour and pride bind you to only lie and lie only when being asked “Have you seen this yourself?” or “Is this good then?”
And it is fairly easy to confirm her statement. There are obviously cameras at the entrance and she knows about them. She wouldn’t be lying about being in front of the building all day.
Let’s take one more look through these files. Can we trust what Flavia’s told us? Only the thief would lie. But have we talked to the thief yet? There should be a way to find out.
POLL
Who’s stolen the bandana? (2 polls to fit remaining suspects, the option with the most votes between all 6 will be what we’re going with)
Felix (journalist) – 0 votes
Flavia (curator) – 3 votes
Heather (visitor 1) – 2 votes
Jim (visitor 2) – 5 votes
Vaughn (visitor 3) – 2 votes
Frédérique (guard) – 4 votes
14th of July
The only people who weren’t interviewed by Linda and were wearing hats entering the museum are Vaughn and Jim. Vaughn must have been the person Falvia’s been talking to about their multiple sleep latency tests. This leaves us with tricorne guy!
“The thief is visitor 2!” we shout to the guard. They pump their fist in the air, cheer and exclaim: “Yes, I knew you would get this! You’re a genius!” They give us a well-deserved hug. “Now, who’s visitor 2 exactly?”
“Grey shirt, pony tail, loves parrots, wearing a tricorne – probably should have led with that. He’s over…” He very much isn’t ‘over there’. Fuck! He ran. – We think. Then we say it out loud. Everyone in the room mutually comes to the conclusion that we should maybe chase him.
Here we go: larsum.com/company-chase/ Reply with a screenshot of the endscreen of the game. If the points add up to at least 2500 our chase will be successful (only the highest score per person will count), if they don’t we’ll fail.
Apart from that just standard rules: collecting bandanas equals points, collecting toothbrushes or crying faces deducts points. The turtleneck turtle means health (max. 3), running into memories of our false accusations deducts health and enhances Jim’s lead. Have fun!
15th of July
We run after the racing robber like a gamer after GPUs or whatever, like a pilot after turbulences, like any sane person away from blue cheese. We’re not ‘literally’ on his tail, but -you know- very close as in nearly able to grab him.
Suddenly we see a random guy to our left looking at his phone about to cross the road. We decide in a split second to grab him instead. A lorry speeds past both of us. “Damn it. That was close. Nice save. Thanks.”, he says. This seems to have become our specialty.
We look back into the direction we were running, but we can’t see Jim anywhere. Shit, he got away. He could have gone North to the harbour, West lies… NO! Enough of this we’ve lost him for good. We can’t get back his precious clothy loot. Maybe it’s for the best though?
The museum will get some desperately needed attention with a bit more drama to it with the thief on the run and will be compensated by the insurance, even if organising that will stress out the director. The artist liked his piece more after the theft.
